the 3.30 am thought - part 1
back after a longgggggggg time (and around CNY again hahaha)..
what brings me back here?
days ago i was awaken at 3.30 am and couldn't sleep again..
i thought of manyyyy things...
one of them was, consumptive VS productive
since i have become a fulltime mom, i didn't really have enough time to create something or what i call being 'productive'
my fixed schedule on weekday:
morning: wake up - eat my breakfast - feed the baby - bathe the baby - take a bath
afternoon: feed myself - feed the baby - nap with the baby - wake up
evening: bathe the baby - take a bath - eat my dinner - feed the baby - sleep with the baby
and suddenly it's weekend already (yay!) with the same routines but plus going out somewhere,
and suddenly it's Sunday night already....
:'(
not that i didn't enjoy my time with the baby
*i'm grateful that i can see her growth time to time, and not depending on someone else to raise her (heard much stories about working mom's biggest problem: nanny)
*also she's cute n funny, sometimes so gemesssshh like i wanna bite her hahaha
it's just... i feel like i'm not useful except for the baby,
i can't be productive..
and when the years have passed, i'm afraid that i will lose my capability (to work and behave professionally, to play music, to pour out my ideas in artwork)
i hire a maid to help me do the house cores & cook actually, and still don't have much time for myself (direct breastfeeding sometimes makes me super sleepy in the afternoon and so awake before dawn)
*and i really have to say to a fulltime mom without any assistant: You're a goddess! i don't know (already) how to be you!
(back to the thought at the dawn)
how consumptive we (me n husband and maybe most of us today) were..
in our spare time we are so attached to the gadget (me to Instagram & Facebook/ TV, husband to 9gag/ FB timeline - slightly better than me).
we consume the gossips, pictures, news, videos, fashion update, culinary info, other's life to the very root of it (you know we can kepo2 in Instagram always...), but we rarely produce something.
this is (maybe) why people like Mark Zuckerberg are not much.
instead of thinking consuming this or that, he creates/ produces/ pours out what is inside the brain.
(oops.. my baby is awake! T__T )
ttyl...
maybe some weeks later
T___T
what brings me back here?
days ago i was awaken at 3.30 am and couldn't sleep again..
i thought of manyyyy things...
one of them was, consumptive VS productive
since i have become a fulltime mom, i didn't really have enough time to create something or what i call being 'productive'
my fixed schedule on weekday:
morning: wake up - eat my breakfast - feed the baby - bathe the baby - take a bath
afternoon: feed myself - feed the baby - nap with the baby - wake up
evening: bathe the baby - take a bath - eat my dinner - feed the baby - sleep with the baby
and suddenly it's weekend already (yay!) with the same routines but plus going out somewhere,
and suddenly it's Sunday night already....
:'(
not that i didn't enjoy my time with the baby
*i'm grateful that i can see her growth time to time, and not depending on someone else to raise her (heard much stories about working mom's biggest problem: nanny)
*also she's cute n funny, sometimes so gemesssshh like i wanna bite her hahaha
it's just... i feel like i'm not useful except for the baby,
i can't be productive..
and when the years have passed, i'm afraid that i will lose my capability (to work and behave professionally, to play music, to pour out my ideas in artwork)
i hire a maid to help me do the house cores & cook actually, and still don't have much time for myself (direct breastfeeding sometimes makes me super sleepy in the afternoon and so awake before dawn)
*and i really have to say to a fulltime mom without any assistant: You're a goddess! i don't know (already) how to be you!
(back to the thought at the dawn)
how consumptive we (me n husband and maybe most of us today) were..
in our spare time we are so attached to the gadget (me to Instagram & Facebook/ TV, husband to 9gag/ FB timeline - slightly better than me).
we consume the gossips, pictures, news, videos, fashion update, culinary info, other's life to the very root of it (you know we can kepo2 in Instagram always...), but we rarely produce something.
this is (maybe) why people like Mark Zuckerberg are not much.
instead of thinking consuming this or that, he creates/ produces/ pours out what is inside the brain.
(oops.. my baby is awake! T__T )
ttyl...
maybe some weeks later
T___T
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